Compulsive Sexual Behaviours or Porn Use that is causing you difficulty.

Counselling for Sex & Porn Issues

This area of my work is commonly termed 'sex addiction', this isn't a medically recognised diagnosis but describes how sex or porn use can feel ‘out of control’ and cause you difficulty.  This could include masturbation, watching porn, engaging in cyber sex, sleeping with strangers, visiting sex workers. It is often not the behaviour itself that is the issue, but your relationship with it. If it is having a destructive impact on some areas of your life, including your work, finances, relationship or sexual wellbeing, and your attempts to stop it are proving unsuccessful, you may benefit from some extra support.

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I am a registered member of the Association for the Treatment of Sexual Addiction and Compulsion (ATSAC) can provide a non judgemental space to talk about difficulties such as those described above, that are worrying you. We can complete an assessment and explore the causes. But this is only the first stage, together we can create strategies to explore changes that you would like to make to achieve your definition of recovery and to lead a more a rewarding life in which you are able to thrive. 

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This is an issue that people from all walks of life can struggle with, regardless of age, gender, religion, sexuality and it is often surrounded by feelings of conflict and shame, it can be very hard to seek support for these reasons, but please do not let that deter you.

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Please be aware that I am only trained to support people with non-offending behaviours. If you are concerned that your behaviour has crossed this line then you may wish to seek support from a specialist agency such as http://www.stopso.org.uk/

Counselling for Partners 

Life throws many surprises at us, but the discovery or disclosure of your partner's problematic sex or porn behaviour can be devastating. It can leave you in a state of confusion with feelings of sorrow, betrayal, anger amongst many others.
It can be helpful to have some individual support at this time, to have a safe space where you can express these conflicting emotions and have the pain that you are feeling heard and recognised.  I can support you to gain a better understanding of what has happened and that it is not your fault or responsibility. Further into counselling, when you are feeling more safe, you may wish to consider what your future options, boundaries and choices might be.

Couple Counselling 

As a qualified couple counsellor, I have undertaken additional training to support couples with the challenges of sex addiction as it is commonly termed. This is often most helpful following all parties having accessed individual therapy, although on initial discovery or disclosure you may also be seeking a space to talk through immediate concerns, understanding and decisions. Later, you may want to focus on disclosure, the decision of whether to stay together or separate, rebuilding trust and creating a mutually rewarding relationship, or overcoming sexual difficulties.